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ok so the feeling of destestation has now evolved into something more complex - depression? anger? confusion? jealousy?...i don't know or maybe it's a mixture of all 4. still as before, simply unexplainable. i just hope it all goes away cuz i really wanna go back to my usual self. i resolved stuff with stace, hoping at least one of the feelings would go away. i guess it is sort of sedated now but not totally gone. we'll just let it be. suppose to meet stace, nadi, soph and kyle tonight for dinner...hopefully i'll be up to it or maybe i just need some time alone. went to aunty may's place yesterday after ballet. dancing does help to clear my mind a little but it's only temporary cuz it all comes back once it's over. well i basically just hung out with my aunts and talked about random stuff. my parents came about 3 hours later and we discussed about our dysfunctional Netto family. i swear, we're like a walking Bold & the Beautiful...seriously. we have still yet to solve one of our family mysteries which has been going on for almost 4 years now. well after a couple of glasses of wine, we headed back home at like 1am. ok i'm gonna try keep my mind busy by clearing out my room. i hope it helps. im in a dilemma at 2:22 PM
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